Embracing Inclusivity: A Journey of Learning and Growth
Me and my dad circa 1987 in our Bonita California back yard.
Starting a new job always comes with excitement, but joining a company with a culture that truly embraces inclusivity and authenticity has been an absolute breath of fresh air. From day one, I’ve felt welcomed, valued, and encouraged to be my true self. This kind of culture doesn’t just happen—it’s built intentionally by people who believe in the power of diversity and the importance of making space for everyone.
I’ve always been passionate about embracing differences. I found out in high school that my father was gay, and from that moment on, my perspective on identity, acceptance, and authenticity shifted in profound ways. My dad was career Navy, and for most of his service, he had to hide who he truly was. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell wasn’t repealed until 2011, long after he had retired, which meant that for decades, being open about his identity could have cost him his career, his livelihood, and the life he had built. He had to compartmentalize, always careful about what he said, who he trusted, and how he presented himself in a world that wasn’t ready to accept him.
Seeing my dad live with that weight, knowing he couldn’t fully embrace his authentic self, left a lasting impact on me. It made me realize how damaging it is when people feel they have to hide who they are just to be accepted or safe. It also made me deeply appreciate the importance of spaces where people can show up as their true selves without fear. Growing up in an environment where I was exposed to different perspectives—from my dad’s experiences to the diverse and accepting community he surrounded himself with—taught me that authenticity is not just a privilege; for many, it’s a struggle.
That’s why inclusivity matters so much to me. It’s not just about words or gestures; it’s about making sure no one feels like they have to shrink themselves to fit into a space that wasn’t designed for them. It’s about creating environments—whether at work, in our communities, or in our personal lives—where people don’t have to choose between who they are and where they belong. My dad’s journey shaped me in ways I will always be grateful for, and it’s a big part of why I believe so strongly in embracing and celebrating the differences that make us unique.
But even with a lifetime of valuing inclusivity, I know there’s always more to learn. At 52, one area where I’m still educating myself is pronouns. I use she/her pronouns, and while I fully support others in using the pronouns that reflect their identity, I sometimes forget to introduce myself that way in meetings. I also catch myself slipping up when referring to colleagues who use they/them pronouns. It’s not intentional, but I know that intent doesn’t erase impact. Growing up, and for decades, I was always taught that they/them is strictly plural, so using it as a singular pronoun is what’s tripping me up the most. My brain automatically wants to correct it, even though I know that language evolves and that they has been used as a singular pronoun for centuries. It’s not about resistance—it’s just about rewiring habits that have been ingrained for so long. But just like with anything new, practice makes progress, and I’m committed to getting it right because people’s identities and comfort matter far more than my grammatical muscle memory. So, rather than just hoping I get it right, I asked a teammate—who identifies as they/them and has been involved in Employee Resource Groups (ERGs)—for guidance.
Their advice was invaluable, and I’m truly grateful for the conversation. They didn’t judge me for making mistakes; instead, they shared insights that are helping me do better. That’s the kind of culture we have here—one where people support each other in becoming more inclusive, not through shame, but through learning.
I recently had another moment of growth when I ran a daily Slack icebreaker and asked people to share a funny pet story—or, if they didn’t have a pet, their spirit animal. In a later conversation, someone kindly pointed out that the term spirit animal can be offensive to Indigenous communities because it originates from sacred spiritual traditions. I had no idea. So I did what I always do when I realize I’ve made a misstep—I educated myself.
I learned that spirit animal has deep cultural significance in Native American and First Nations traditions, tied to ancestral heritage and personal guidance. When non-Indigenous people use the term casually, it can be seen as cultural appropriation, stripping it of its original meaning. A more respectful alternative would be saying kindred spirit, personal symbol, or inner animal. It was an honest mistake, but I appreciate the feedback because it gave me a chance to grow.
What I love about this company is that it fosters an environment where we can have these conversations—where learning is encouraged, and inclusivity is a shared value. Especially in today’s political climate, where some leaders are pushing policies that seek to erase or minimize identities, it’s more important than ever to get this right. Respecting pronouns, understanding cultural significance, and embracing people for who they are isn’t just about being “politically correct”—it’s about human decency.
How We Can Be More Inclusive?
Inclusivity isn’t just about policies or buzzwords—it’s about everyday actions that create a culture where everyone feels seen, valued, and respected. It starts with being intentional about our words, behaviors, and mindset. One of the simplest ways to foster inclusivity is by using people’s correct names and pronouns. It may take time to adjust, especially if you’re not used to using certain pronouns, but making the effort shows respect. If you make a mistake, correct yourself and move forward—it’s not about being perfect, but about showing that you care.
Another way to be more inclusive is by being open to feedback and willing to learn. If someone tells you that a phrase or action is hurtful, instead of getting defensive, take it as an opportunity to grow. None of us know everything, and that’s okay. What matters is how we respond when we learn something new. A simple, “Thank you for sharing that with me—I appreciate it,” can go a long way in building trust and showing that you’re committed to being better.
Inclusivity also means creating spaces where people feel comfortable being their authentic selves. This can be as simple as making sure everyone has a voice in meetings, being mindful of different cultural backgrounds and accessibility needs, or celebrating diverse perspectives rather than expecting people to conform. It’s about embracing differences, not just tolerating them.
Most importantly, being inclusive is an ongoing journey. It’s not a one-time effort but a continuous practice of listening, learning, and evolving. When we commit to inclusivity, we don’t just make our workplaces better—we create a ripple effect that extends into our communities and beyond. Because at the end of the day, everyone deserves to be valued for exactly who they are.
I’m committed to continuing to learn, practice, and grow because inclusivity isn’t just a box to check—it’s a way of life. And I’m grateful to be surrounded by colleagues who share that belief.
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